I woke up this morning to a cold and cloudy day. I was going to go check on Red, but I didn't. Nathan went...and couldn't find him. I was changing clothes when mom came running to the door and yelled that Red was out of the pasture. I ran to put on my jeans, thinking that it would be fairly easy to get him back to the gate and settled down....what I found was completely different. I grabbed my coat and ran to the pasture, looking for Nathan. Running to the steep side of the pasture, what greeted my eyes was not pleasant. Red was in a deep whole with a mass of brush. He had fallen down the hill, rolled over the electric fence, and was sitting in a dog position straddling a log. I ran through the briers to get to him, and found that his leg was stuck. It was a maze of logs and briers...there was no getting him out. Nathan ran to get mom and dad, while I stayed with my dear horse. For an hour and a half we tried to get him out while mom called the vet. Dad and I tried in vain to get him to stand...he wanted to...he didn't give up. He tried hard to stand, but he couldn't. His back legs would not work. He could not stand. We called some people to come and help us...five of us could not get him to stand. I hugged him and cried in his mane, knowing that he was down and would not get back up. It was time to say goodbye to my dear horse. It was time to tell him that I would listen for his hoofbeats in heaven. I took Nathan's knife and cut a handful of his mane, stuffing it in my pocket. At least I got to spend the last hour of my horse's life with him, hugging him and crying into his mane. I kissed him and stroked his nose. The vet was coming. I never left my horse's side. Never. I wanted to be with him when he died. And I was....I was with him. The girl came and looked him over...there was nothing she could do. The hill was steep and slippery, and he could not stand. He looked so sleepy and scared. He would groan and rest his head against my body while I talked to him and cried. It was time for my horse to go. The vet got the shot ready, and came over beside him. I kissed him and spoke to him, telling him that I would listen for his hoofbeats in heaven. She stuck the needle in a vain, and his eyes got heavy. He jerked, and then fell over, his head resting against the log. I started sobbing and got down in the mud with him, holding his head. His body jerked and his eyes were closed, and he was gasping for breath. The vet gave him another dose, and said that he was mentally out of it...his body was just shutting down. I stayed right by him until his last heart beats died. I never let go. Right before he left us, I told him that I loved him, and would always love him. I stayed with him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him, kissing his head. My horse was dead. He was gone. I'm crying now as I write this...I can hardly see the screen. It's so cold and rainy and foggy. My dear horse is dead and I can hardly believe it. I cannot believe I said goodbye. Somehow, I knew that he would not live to see his 29th birthday on November 30th. I somehow knew that he would not make it. I went to the pasture last night and took a bunch of pictures. He ate his last meal this morning while we were waiting for the vet. I kissed him for the last time. I will not be able to bury my head in the warmth of his neck and tell him I love him. I can hear the back-hoe running. He will be under the ground forever. I miss my horse so much......he was my favorite. I love my horse.
Red, I will listen for your hoofbeats in Heaven, and just for you, I and my friend are making a tribute....just for you, Red. I love you, so much. I love you read. Rest in peace. You were a wonderful horse to me, and a wonderful friend. Silkie and Belle will miss you too...now they will wish they had you to boss them around. I will miss feeding you, brushing you....I will miss all of the times you would swing the tack-room door open and closed. I will miss you soft nickers at feeding time, and your stubborn will when riding. I love you, Red........I will listen for you hoofbeats in Heaven. I love you, my dear horse.
I took this picture of you and I last night...the last night you were with us. I love you. I love you Red...always.
